1. Drop The Weight of Expectations That You Have Inadvertently Placed on Yourself.
Sometimes, it’s not as though you want to put yourself under the pressure of living up to the expectation of being a pastor’s wife. It could be suggestions from people to you directly or what you have seen pastors’ wives to be in the media or your church circle that informed your decision.
Whichever way, rid yourself free of all expectations and you will be on your way to recovering your sanity.
2. Find You!
Hey girlfriend …
Who are you?
Who do you really want to be?
Who and what did you tell your friends and your siblings you were going to become whilst you were a kid?
Our childhood harbors some of the purest memories of our lives. Who did you want to become as you grew up and who do you want to become now? Not who does society want you to become.
Visit these memories, find you and do you.
3. There Ain’t No Complete Freedom For You As A Woman If Your Total Financial Life Is Dependent On A Man.
Make yourself some money girlfriend. Whether your spouse is earning in hundreds of thousands of dollars or in the millions, make yourself some moolah 💰
Do this through your career, skills, set up a business or pick up a job.
Whichever way, make yourself some hard cash. It’s a sure route to self-reliance, integrity for self and honor for yourself (I’ve got a masterpiece guide/system to help you with this)
4. Leverage Your Brilliance, Hone Them, Master Them And Shine With Them.
One of the crazy things that pastors’ wives tend to encounter is the fact that they are constantly being compared with their husbands.
“Oh she can’t preach like him or she can’t write like him or she doesn’t ooze his charisma.” Should you care? Are you twins? Face your lane and allow your Pastor-spouse face his own.
Now, on a serious note, you may not be able to teach like him but you sure as heaven can do something better than him. It could be the way you rock in your heels,👠 the way you connect with others and empathize with them, your smile or your down-to-earth nature. Don’t trivialize your strengths.
Girl, find your brilliance, your magic and own the “life” out of it.
5. Find Your Place Within The Ministry, Serve There, Shine and Rock It.
In this life, you’ve got to understand something … If you let people put you under unnecessary pressure, when they are sleeping at night, you will be the only one keeping awake to nurse your pains. Don’t do that to yourself.
Another thing in this pastors’ wives game (permit me to call it that) is that there is no formal template. There are no hard and fast rules to go by.
Pastor Keyon’s wife travels all over the world to preach; very nice and good, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.
Another pastor’s wife is stuck behind the pulpit every Sunday because her husband is a very much sought after speaker globally; ok cool, if that’s not what you want to do, don’t let anyone make you do it.
Someone else’s wife hosts Ministers Wives Conference every year, if that’s not your thing and you don’t feel called to it, please cut out.
As for you, find your place of assignment and stay there, serving God and enjoying an easy non-pressured life.
If you are called into the 5-fold ministry, sweet. Which in particular?
Identify it, read books on earlier giants of the faith who have functioned in that office, study any of the apostles who functioned in that office, fellowship with God, rub minds with the Holy Ghost and do your best to serve in that place. You will shine, dazzle and command the attention of your world.
The beauty of a pastors’ wife is in knowing who she is and sticking to who she is, not morphing into something else because of her position.
One last thing; have a venture that you run outside the ministry where you absolutely call the shots even if you are the vice-president or co-senior pastor in your ministry. The explanation for this is quite simple but lengthy. Feel free to reach out to my inbox if you are a pastors’ wife and you need some clarity on this.
Take the stress out of your life. Complete this short quiz now to discover your unique place/office in the ministryDiscover Your Unique Place In The Ministry